Mazel Tov!

At 12:01AM today, gay marriage became legal in New York state.  Andrew Sullivan wrote an amazing piece on The Daily Beast which includes this passage about his own marriage:

I still didn’t think it would ever happen to me. I thought I was too emotionally damaged, my emotions and sexuality severed by all those years of loneliness and arrested emotional development. I thought my heart had too much scar tissue, and I could live my life well enough with just friendship and occasional sexual encounters or dates. But when I first set eyes on my husband, I knew I had lucked out. Some things you simply know. And when we finally got married, a few years later, and our mothers walked us down the makeshift garden aisle, and my sister gave the reading through tears, and one of our beagles howled through the vows, and my father put his arms around me and hugged, I did not hear civilization crumble. I felt a wound being healed. It is a rare privilege to spend your adult life fighting for a right that was first dismissed as a joke, only finally to achieve it in six states and Washington, D.C. But how much rarer to actually stumble upon someone who could make it a reality. And to have it happen to me in my own lifetime! This joy is compounded, deepened, solidified by the knowledge that somewhere, someone just like I was as a kid will be able to look to the future now and not see darkness—but the possibility of love and home. That, I realized, was really what I had been fighting for for two decades: to heal the child I had once been—and the countless children in the present and future whose future deserved, needed, begged for a model of commitment and responsibility and love.

And isn’t that what marriage is about for everyone, gay or straight?  The healing of who you were by two people lovingly joining forces to consciously co-create a new reality?  You take remnants of your old life with you to the new one, but the one created will be very different from the one you left behind.

Why on earth anyone would be against this, I’m unsure.  I don’t understand the anti-gay marriage people whether it’s the haters that are violent or the super religious, loving folks that “tolerate” gays while praying to their God that these gay people see the light and “change”.

Sure the latter ones are nice and non-threatening, but it’s insulting, frankly.  People don’t want to be tolerated.  They want respect and reverence, which is different. Which brings us back to New York state who’s dishing it in droves today.

Congratulations!

Happy Holidays

I hope you’re not offended by the title of this post. I honestly don’t get why folks complain about the decreased use of the phrase, Merry Christmas.  Why would anyone be offended by the wishing of happiness between people?

I thought folks said “Happy Holidays” in order to cover both Christmas and New Years in one swoop whenever the oh so witty, “Merry Christmas! See you next year,” quip started to feel old and overused. I never thought people were trying to remove Christ from the equation. I just figured they were being verbally efficient.

I had 2 Jewish friends in high school and didn’t make any Buddhist, Hindu, or Muslim friends until college which is why it wasn’t until college that I thought about what it must feel like to live in a world where you’re inundated by another religion’s traditions every year. Where every commercial, ad campaign, window treatment and even the damn store hours are focused around a holiday you don’t celebrate.

As a parent, I wonder how non-Christian moms and dads deal with the television specials, Santa questions and plethora of decorations with their kids? How do you explain to a 5-year-old that he really was a good little boy this year, even though a fat guy in a red suit didn’t drop off a load of gifts during the night.

The way I see it, others have respected my beliefs for decades, no questions asked. Once I lived a little and became exposed to other religions, traditions, and belief systems I figured what’s the harm in respecting them?

The word holiday literally means, an official day without work; festive; and if you’re British, vacation, which is exactly what happens this time of year.  Most jobs give you December 25th off whether you celebrate it or not; you get invited to lots of festive parties and often times use the time to travel.  What’s wrong with calling this weekend exactly what is and wishing that it be happy?

The way I see if, if the new agers never bitch about the dropping of Thanks and Giving when wishing family a Happy Turkey Day and the religious fanatics don’t freak out when Halloween replaces All Hallows Eve and TV pundits don’t chastize folks for wishing each other a Happy 4th of July in lieu of Independence Day, then why do Christians bitch about the specific salutation terminology surrounding Christmas?

Personally, I think all of this fuss is a ruse to draw attention to the complainer (i.e., TV pundits, radio hosts and NY Times best selling authors), make them more money and has nothing to do with Christ or Christmas. If it did and we all were truly offended, none of us would perpetuate the Santa myth, put a live tree in our homes or a giant, inflatable snow man on our front lawns. Instead we’d  simply bake a cake that said Happy Birthday Jesus and focus on the true meaning of the holiday.

We don’t.

So cut the crap. What do you care if I wish you, Season’s Greetings?  Relax and enjoy a festive, vacation day.  You’re free to spend it worshipping, praying or watching the Christmas Story marathon on TBS for that matter.  No one can take the day and it’s personal meaning away from you and it’s time to stop pretending that they can.

Origin of Stupidity

I’m going to let Christina do all the talking because she does it so well and I love the way she says “bullshit” with her Romanian accent.  Take it away Christina…

more about “Origin of Stupidity“, posted with vodpod

We Live On A Rock

This is the longest I’ve ever gone without posting original content since I started my blog and I must say, I didn’t miss it as much as I thought I would.

I’m not sure what that means in terms of my blogging.  Am I getting tired of posting or simply tired of putting my opinion out there?  It seems as though a funny thing happened once I turned 40.  I’m much more comfortable keeping my opinion to myself.   I mean, who really gives a shit?  Most folks are going to do whatever they want to do regardless of what I say.

It could be that I’m just mellowing out in my old age.  The younger me needed to be pissed off to express myself. I’m not sure if I’m less angry, more apathetic, or just tired of all the unsolicited opinions out there in the news, masquerading as facts and not wanting to add to the insanity.

A few weeks ago, Life On Mars wrapped up it’s one season story line.  The comments made by Michael Imperioli’s character, Ray, really resonated with me.

Maybe that’s why I haven’t been blogging so much lately.  I’m perfectly fine spending my time with those making this “sweet swinging sphere remotely tolerable”.   Right now I’m cool with the mystery of it all.

Rick Warren

Initially I was disappointed in Obama’s choice of pastor to give the invocation at the inauguration next month. Then Whoopi Goldberg on an episode of The View, pointed out the following:  In the spirit of the Reverend Wright controversy during the election, if you assumed that Obama listened to Jeremiah, took what he needed and left the rest behind, then we certainly should be able to do the same thing with Pastor Rick Warren.

You can like his books and not like his stance on gays. You can recognize that he’s one of the few evangelicals that actually believes, cares about and preaches on global warming and be miffed that he doesn’t support a woman’s right to choose.  You can be impressed by the fact that he wants all of his congregation to focus on helping the poor and disappointed that he’s so darn territorial with the term, marriage.

I’ve watched the beliefnet video where Wareen supposedly equates incest with homosexuality and I’m not 100% convinced that was his intention.  One could argue from the clip that he’s simply fighting to keep marriage as a man/woman thing and misspeaks when attempting to prove this point.  You’ll have to watch it and decide for yourself.

I’m very liberal when it comes to social issues, so Rick Warren wouldn’t appeal to me as much as say Bishop Sponge (click here or here) or Jim Wallis (click here or here)  for example, but if Rick Warren becomes the new face of the evangelical right, in my humble opinion that would be a huge improvement.  A pastor with influence that actually listens to scientists and wants his followers to act like Jesus by helping the poor and working towards peace instead of only praying to him, works for me.  And apparently it works for others as well – even singer and lesbian activist, Melissa Etheridge is on board.

I’ve got to admit that my inner cynic is rearing her ugly head and wondering if Obama is being inclusive to the religious right or attempting to manipulate them more towards the middle?  Could he really be that smart or did he simply enjoy himself at The Saddleback Civil Forum and thus wanted to return the favor?

Hmm…I’ll have to think about that one some more.  In the meantime, I’m going to cherry pick this guy’s beliefs like I cherry pick every other thing that has to do with religion and not fret too much about it.  On a cellular level and at the core of my being I believe that gays aren’t going to hell and should have the same rights that I do. No pastor no matter how strong his following, how influential his position, how wealthy his is from his book sales nor how famous from being picked to give an invocation can sever my own personal relationship with the Divine. I’m the only one that has the power to do that.

So I say relax, take a breath and what you need.  The rest I’m sure will work itself out when it’s supposed to.

Happy Festivus

Now that the truth about Santa has been revealed to my youngest daughter, we are able to tweak our Christmas holiday this year. Rather than lugging our family gifts three and half hours away just to open them on the 25th, we decided to celebrate here in Maryland a few days early which would free us up to travel and celebrate Christmas with our extended family.

So my kids have been counting down to their Christmas, today, in lieu of the real Christmas on Tuesday. Considering that many of the young folks in our life still believe in Santa, we didn’t want to risk tipping anyone off, so we decided to count down to Christmas, code name, Festivus instead.

Had we not had plans last night we would have kicked off Festivus Eve with a trip through the McDonald’s drive thru, as we felt that would be the appropriate culinary companion to the holiday for the rest of us. We may celebrate this glorious, Festivus morning with Sausage McMuffins and hash browns instead, although a full sit down meal at a local diner may be more appropriate.

You can imagine how much I’m looking forward to the airing of grievances portion of the morning, whereas my husband, an ex-wrestler from high school, is psyched about the after meal display of his feats of strength. Since Festivus doesn’t end until the head of the household is pinned I may use this morning to the teach the girls how to kick an assailant in the balls so we can move the morning along. Sadly we don’t have a pole, but I do have a upright, metal paper towel holder that I’m hoping will do.

Happy Festivus Everyone!

Last Minute Gift Ideas

Lady of the night, lady of the night, lady of the night…or for those that don’t understand the politically correct dialect of the holiday season… Ho, Ho, Ho!

Are you sweating bullets yet? It’s the Saturday before Christmas. Holy Shit! The malls will be jammed, the streets will be packed, parking lots will be filled to capacity and you need to enter this lion’s den of lunacy to shop. Sorry but I can’t help you. I gave you permission a few weeks ago to buy gift cards at your local super market. It’s not my problem if you didn’t heed my advice. But I can help those that need some last minute, fun gift ideas.

Yesterday, while walking downtown after enjoying a late lunch, we ducked into Cinegraphic Studios a store that sells “Silly Things For Silly People.” It’s a great store for anyone with an open mind, a liberal view of religion and a deep hatred of George W. Bush.

Here I found silly and interesting last minute gifts and stocking stuffers not to mention all the Jesus toys that I had featured in a previous post called: Lighten Up.

Freudian Slippers

Looking Good For Jesus Compact Mirror

Wash Away Your Sins Lip Balm

Instant Happy Childhood Memories Breath Spray

George Bush Toilet Paper

The Hillary Nutcracker

I know what you’re thinking. But I don’t have a fun downtown store like Cinegraphic Studios in my city. Well order the stuff online, have it shipped to your loved one and wrap the picture so they know what they’ll be receiving in the mail a few days after Christmas.

Or go brave the insanity along with everyone else. But if you do…keep your mouth shut, your head down and your eye rolling to a minimum. It’s the weekend before Christmas. Expect crowds, lines, and for the day to be an overall SNAFU. Christmas is the same day each year and you’ve had plenty of time to pre-plan. If you didn’t, don’t allow that to be your excuse for being an ass this Christmas.

 

 

Pardoned

Gillian Gibbons has been pardoned. After bitching all week about this it was so nice to see that logic prevailed.

Continuing the Conversation

Earlier this week I blogged about Gillian Gibbons and her legal problems in the Sudan. Ms. Gibbons teacher to some, infidel to others, has been officially sentenced to 15 days in jail. Luckily lashings were not a part of her sentence. Unfortunately for her students but perhaps fortunately for her she will be deported as soon as she serves her time. I say fortunately because CNN is reporting that hundreds of Sudanese protestors are calling for her execution.

This international event I believe highlights a bigger question. When do the responsible behaviors required by all trump the religious freedom of some? Or more specifically, what do we do as the collective when specific religious beliefs interfere with the comings and goings of a just society? Justice refers to behaviors that are fair and reasonable. When behaviors based on religious beliefs become unreasonable, (as the often do, interestingly enough) when do we as a society, say, enough, already?

In this country we have said it before. When a religious belief forces children to marry, or encourages abortion clinics to be bombed, homosexuals to be tortured, or crosses to be burned in the front yards of African-American homes, we use words like deplorable, obnoxious, criminal, hateful and scream, enough! We arrest these folks and in our tradition of separating our churches from the state, if found guilty, we punish them. In essence we state that we don’t give a damn about the religious beliefs of some when those beliefs interfere with the personal liberties, freedoms and basic rights of others.

As our global society becomes more interconnected more discourse about acceptable practices and standards must occur. The beauty of this conversation is that it does not have to stem from a religious context. Because religion isn’t a requirement for one to be ethical this conversation doesn’t have to take a my-religion-is-better-than-your-religion tone. In fact, to be affective, religion needs to stay out of it and a just, reasonable society needs to merely step up and say – No fucking way. Knock it off. Don’t even go there.

The fact is a teacher trying to include her students in a lesson on animal habitats made a mistake based on being an outsider of a particular culture. She’s guilty only of a cultural fopah. A societal snafu, if you will. Her intention was not to offend the members of an entire religion. But when the riot-like response to her honest mistake takes the intention of calling for her death, we need to take a stand.

So I respectfully ask our current President to stand up and say, enough. Not as a Christian but as a reasonable, logical and ethical human being. I ask the folks running for president to say, “knock it off”. Not as a Mormon, or a Catholic or a Christian but as human beings that recognize the need to make a statement. Take advantage of this moment and take a stand so that if and when an incident happens here on our soil, the precedent that ethics and justice trumps religion will have already been set.

Lighten Up!

Remember the cartoon riots in Denmark? Back in September of 2005, protests erupted over cartoons satirizing Muhammad and Islam that were published in the Danish paper, Politiken.

Now a British teacher, Gillian Gibbons has been arrested in Sudan for allowing her pupils to name their class teddy bear, Muhammad. She faces 40 lashes and months of jail time for this horrid act of blasphemy. Which got me thinking….why is the Islamic holy guy so damn precious? Other holy guys get all kinds of abuse and no one says anything. In fact, just a few quick searches on Amazon and I found all sorts of things that should make Christians everywhere want to lash out both literally and figuratively.

There’s the Funky Fresh Jesus:

The Special Effects Jesus (Note the cool, glow in the dark hands):

 

I don’t know what to call this guy

Because he looks so much like this guy:

So let’s just call him the Domino’s Oreo Pizza Jesus, which leaves us left with the South Park Jesus

 

Complete with a jug of water AND wine.

Note that I haven’t even gotten into pictures, posters, or DVD’s of biblical stories reenacted by fresh vegetables. I’m guessing shirts like, “Who would Muhammad bomb?” or bumper stickers like, “I found Muhammad…he was behind the couch the entire time!” wouldn’t go over well over there.

Ironically, the Danish riots were in response to cartoons which were in response to an article that stated how afraid writers, illustrators and performers were to touch Islam. The article was about the fact that if you become mainstream, which is apparently what Islamic followers want, then you have to take with it the pitfalls of mainstream popularity, i.e., being open to all the shit all the other religions are open to: SNL skits, satirical editorial cartoons, South Park episodes and plastic tchatchkies. And, not only are you allowed to be a target, but those that target you are allowed to make a ton of money, doing it.

So it seems to me that fundamental Islamic fanatics need to have a Project Runway moment and make a decision. You’re either in or you’re out. And if you’re in, especially in this country, get ready because the funky fresh Muhammad will be the least of your concerns. Because although there are more Christians than Muslins in the United States, the capitalists out number everyone and in the end, the almighty dollar is the one we worship the most.