To The Lady With The Gold Nissan Altima

Please stop blocking the car lane behind West Frederick Middle School.  It’s a drop off lane for a reason.  It is not a sit there and talk to your kid about his day lane.  It is not a visualize doing well on your test lane.  It is not a bitch to your kid about his latest infraction lane.  It is not a lecture your kid about how "disappointed" you are lane.   

It’s the DROP OFF lane.  Drop off your kid and pull away.  Only 5 cars can fit in this lane at one time.  Straggler parents back up the traffic flow so KNOCK IT OFF!  If you want to discuss something with your kid, do it on the way to school or pull into a parking space if you suddenly have the urge to talk about the birds and bees.

And one more thing.  The kid’s in middle school.  He can walk the 50 yards to the door on his own.  You don’t have to watch him until his silhouette disappears inside the inner foyer.  Jesus!  As soon as he shuts the car door you should jam that Altima into gear.  Hell, I pull away before the automatic side door of my minivan completely closes.  I’ve got places to go, people to see and things to do.  Chances are you do too, woman.  For God’s sakes get with the program crazy lady! 

This is why I have this blog.  So I can let it out my frustrations and not cause carnage on America’s highways.  Wondering if you suffer from road rage?  Take at self test here at this site authored by Chris Carlton.  I scored a 35.


2 responses to “To The Lady With The Gold Nissan Altima

  1. Ohhhh this is one of my biggest pet peeves! I can’t stand it when parents don’t know the drop-off routine! It seems like every day I encounter something like this at my son’s school! I scored a 44, btw! 🙂 Thanks for the fun!

  2. Here’s a simple solution: Think like your brother. Scope out the daily arrival of Gold Nissan Altima Lady. Then pounce. Get in front of GNAL … and then wait… til the kids get inside the school… what until you’ve finished your 5-minute cell phone conservations… wait until GNAL start laying on the car horn or better yet gets out of her car. Then explain to her that what she is feel at that very moment is what you feel like every single day when the GNAL is in front of you. She won’t like it and probably won’t accept that she even backs up the line. But at least for more day, you get to get under GNAL skin. And then the next morning you can give her a big wave (full hand or single finger is your choice) and smile. Kill her with kindness.

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