We’ve already celebrated Christmas here at my house.  My kids woke up Sunday morning and opened all of their gifts.  Because some of the neighbor kids as well as classmates still believe in Santa my kids were told to lie from Sunday until Christmas and tell no one about the new Wii games, books or music.  To do this and maintain my “good parenting” certification, I’ve convinced my youngest who someday wants to be an actress, that she’s in training.  She’s not lying – she’s merely method acting.  My eldest who’s more altruistic in nature isn’t telling tales but rather “saving Christmas” for the toddlers that live close by.

I’m prepared to get in on the act as well.  Because shiny new Rock Band instruments are now sitting in our living room, we leaked word on the street that various illnesses have sprung up inside our home such that it’s off limits until after the holidays.  If anyone stops by I’m prepared to open the door just a crack and scare any kids from my porch with a mythical, Ferris Bueler-like coughing attack if need be.

As I revealed last year in this blog, to avoid tipping off others we call our gala “Festivus” which allows us a family gathering with just the four of us before we meet up with our extended families.  It also simplifies our life in terms of not having to bootleg presents across state lines.  You might wonder why we don’t drive north to visit relatives on the 26th, a reasonable alternative that many families do this time of year.  By moving up our holiday and getting there on the 24th, we can see all important family members in one swoop:  His side Christmas Eve and my side Christmas Day with time left over to squeeze in friends as well.  Driving up on the 26th and traveling to 9 or 10 different homes individually would be a logistical nightmare.

It’s odd, but it works.  Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a shot of wine posing as Nyquil waiting for me in the bathroom.

Happy Festivus Everyone!


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