Mazel Tov!

At 12:01AM today, gay marriage became legal in New York state.  Andrew Sullivan wrote an amazing piece on The Daily Beast which includes this passage about his own marriage:

I still didn’t think it would ever happen to me. I thought I was too emotionally damaged, my emotions and sexuality severed by all those years of loneliness and arrested emotional development. I thought my heart had too much scar tissue, and I could live my life well enough with just friendship and occasional sexual encounters or dates. But when I first set eyes on my husband, I knew I had lucked out. Some things you simply know. And when we finally got married, a few years later, and our mothers walked us down the makeshift garden aisle, and my sister gave the reading through tears, and one of our beagles howled through the vows, and my father put his arms around me and hugged, I did not hear civilization crumble. I felt a wound being healed. It is a rare privilege to spend your adult life fighting for a right that was first dismissed as a joke, only finally to achieve it in six states and Washington, D.C. But how much rarer to actually stumble upon someone who could make it a reality. And to have it happen to me in my own lifetime! This joy is compounded, deepened, solidified by the knowledge that somewhere, someone just like I was as a kid will be able to look to the future now and not see darkness—but the possibility of love and home. That, I realized, was really what I had been fighting for for two decades: to heal the child I had once been—and the countless children in the present and future whose future deserved, needed, begged for a model of commitment and responsibility and love.

And isn’t that what marriage is about for everyone, gay or straight?  The healing of who you were by two people lovingly joining forces to consciously co-create a new reality?  You take remnants of your old life with you to the new one, but the one created will be very different from the one you left behind.

Why on earth anyone would be against this, I’m unsure.  I don’t understand the anti-gay marriage people whether it’s the haters that are violent or the super religious, loving folks that “tolerate” gays while praying to their God that these gay people see the light and “change”.

Sure the latter ones are nice and non-threatening, but it’s insulting, frankly.  People don’t want to be tolerated.  They want respect and reverence, which is different. Which brings us back to New York state who’s dishing it in droves today.



3 responses to “Mazel Tov!

  1. Humans banter social issues. Some lose, some win. But in the end, a social issue between humans is simply that. Regardless the issue being bantered about, as long as the arena used is only society, or personal choice, or explaining a compuslsion, there can be no complete resolution. There will always be another “banter” to enter. Someone else will hold an objection.

    But bring in the concept of a Holy God and the bantering escalates to “something more”. I find that truth both unsettling and peaceful. It tells me that, regardless what I say about a subject of social debate my allegance to God will become a serious factor at some point. It becomes a factor for what I say. It becomes a factor in my own conscience. And it becomes a factor for the response of those who listen. There is no compromise with a Holy God as there might be between humans in social context. And this poses as a wall unsurmountable.

    The debates of what is right or acceptable will ensue in a free society. And those who wish to make their choice, or compulsion, law will suffer under their own choice. How much better it would be if we would just all shut up about our special interests. The government is there to provide oil to the machine of society. It was not instituted to lock down certain aspects of freedom, pro or con our special interest.

    But doesn’t this last statement enter into the “Bantering” realm.

    By His Grace.

  2. Your comment is very well written. I just wish I were smart enough to understand what you’re trying to say here. Are you happy about this development or sad? For or against gay marriage?

    I’m guessing by your line, “suffer under their own choice” you’re against. You also seemed to be against expressing opinions, but you expressed it here, which you pointed out yourself.

    So I went to your blog and I get it now – you’re against it.

  3. I can’t tell you how relieved I am that you were confused Linda. My head is still spinning. Bantering is a perfect description for that…..whatever that was.

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